Marcus Duyzend
Looking Out, Looking In
When I was in Boy Scouts, there was an older father who enjoyed coming along on troop hikes. He was in great shape for being in his 70’s, but he was somewhat slower than the energetic scouts who would charge ahead, pausing only at trail junctions and for an occasional pit stop. Attempts to restrain them typically failed.
I was part of this restless group for the first few hikes I took with the troop. But before long, I began to feel sorry for the gentleman in the back. Looking within myself, I knew that the right thing to do was to stay with him and look out for him, and so I did on future hikes. It paid off. Not only did I feel good about making the dad feel like a part of the group rather than like unwanted baggage, but I also learned to appreciate the landscape we were walking through. The slower, more relaxed pace opened my eyes to things I would otherwise have missed, and my new hiking partner turned out to be a knowledgeable naturalist. He taught me about the geologic processes that had formed the landscape before me. He helped me learn to recognize a number of native plants using features I’d never noticed before. Also a student of Native American culture, he shared with me indigenous stories about the areas we were hiking through. I arrived at campsites and lunch spots more energized, less sore, and much more informed than the others, who had nothing to show for their excessive speed but a few minutes more time to refresh their unnecessarily overworked bodies.
I had thought that my decision to stay in the back would cause the other scouts to treat me as something of an outcast, for the slow hiker was the brunt of many of the complaints and jokes that made up the bulk of trail conversation. But instead, my decision gained me nothing but respect from the other scouts. They even chose me as their leader for several weeklong trips we had planned for the following year.
Too many of us think we need to rush ahead, to compete for the top positions, to leave some mark on the world. This is a mistake that will only make us sore and tired. Far better to look within ourselves and do what we feel is right, even if at the outset that appears to put us at the back of the pack. We may end up affecting one person’s life, or we may end up shaking the world. We may become powerful leaders, or we may find ourselves leading a quiet existence. It is hard to know exactly where our hearts will take us, but it is easy to see that following the path they lead us on is a sure way to happy, fulfilling lives.
Fellow classmates,
I say to each one of you:
Be yourself, and be content with who you are. Authenticity will take you farther and make you happier than any attempt to fit some artificial image.
Follow your gut feelings. Seek the advice of others--different considerations often come into focus when things are viewed from different perspectives--but do not feel compelled to follow this advice, no matter how much you respect its source. Only you know what the right decisions are for you.
Spend your life doing things that you enjoy. Do not waste your years slogging through work you find menial, even if you are good at it, even if it is considered prestigious, even if it offers tempting perks.
At the same time, remember that life is not perfect. There will be times of loss, of difficulty, of tedium. There will be times when things will not work out as hoped. But keep a positive, upbeat attitude. Enjoy each minute for what it is. Focus on the 80% of your life that is great. Don’t let the 20% that is not bring you down.
Remember that every day is a part of your life. Treat it as such. Think about the future, but do not make a habit of sacrificing your happiness today for the sake of tomorrow. Don’t live just for special occasions. Make every day remarkable.
As you try to discern your place in the world, do not just look outward. It is only by also looking inward, and being true to the self you discover, that you will enjoy a meaningful and joyful life.
Williams College Class of 2006, vale.
June 4, 2006