Where is God in Tragedy?

A reflection by Mariama Massaquoi '07, Fall Family Weekend Multi-Faith Service, October 2005

Where is God in Tragedy?

   So, this is one of those questions where the answer’s not really easy to find, if it can be found at all. And yet it’s an answer that lately I’ve been constantly searching for. Not only because I was asked to reflect on it but because it’s an unavoidable question these days. Where was god when the tsunami happened, when so many people lost their lives in hurricane Katrina and even more to the earthquake in Pakistan?

But I realized that had I been the victim of those events my question would have been so different. It probably would have been, “Where was God when I lost my mother, when I lost my family, my home?”

   Yesterday I thought to myself, how can I search for the answer, when I don’t even fully understand the question? What is tragedy? Fortunately for me, I don’t think I’ve ever really experienced it. But when I think about the people who have and try to put myself in their shoes, I realize that tragedy is more than just the cause. It’s the devastating effect on the human condition.

   And from that perspective I saw that people are experiencing tragedy all the time. I see this especially in children, those that are victims of hunger, poverty and abuse, because they are so dear to my heart. So instead of asking “Where is God in Tragedy?” as if tragedy only happens at particular times, the question becomes “Where is God?”

   And for some reason this reminded me of an experience I had this summer working at a camp for kids with emotional and behavioral disabilities, basically kids that have had difficult upbringings and been victims of abusive relationships. It was a very challenging experience for me to see such purity corrupted, to see so much anger and resentment for life. And during that time I wrote a poem that was initially supposed to be about my despair but then became about my hope.

Please don’t choose the stuff that will make us lose.

I know you’re confused and tired of being abused.

That’s why you crap on my heart whenever anything pure beings to start,

and I’m just tired of receiving these emotional farts.

Every time there seems to be progress, here comes all this unnecessary mess

and then you begin to regress.

Why does such a blessing have to experience so much stress?!

Still, I must confess

Even after all you put me through,

You still have my heart. You still have my mind,

and I’m raking it to find

Ways to make this load lighter, ‘cause your soul is such a fighter

aching to fill its desires.

And my heart just breaks for you Love

when I see the life that’s been sent to you from above

like the clipped wings of a dove

But believe me you can fly, we’ve just got to stop crying and try

Quit questioning why

and trying to justify what can’t be justified.

I look into your eyes and cannot deny the pain that therein lies

So I will pray for you Love

and I will do for you Love

and I will push you Love

until you are stable

until you are able

The hope from this poem helped me to realize that God was still near. I personally have this belief that because we are God’s creation, God’s residue must be within all of us. So, even though God may be harder to see in times of tragedy, that God was still there giving strength and hope to those children that their lives will get better and giving me strength and hope that I can help make that happen.

So, for now, when I think of the question, “Where is God in Tragedy?” my answer is, “Where He has always been.”